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I Learn Library

A human library inspired by the stories in the film

Sometimes I don’t feel fit for this world

By Joddy  |   From : Saint Denis, France  |   School : Lycee Suger

Hello, my name is Joddy. I am 17. My mom is Gypsy and my dad is from French Guyana. My mom was born and grew up in France with her parents and her 2 sisters and 2 brothers. My dad was born in France, but he went to French Guyana when he was 1 year old, at his grandmother’s house. He stayed there until he was 2 years old. Then my great grandmother and him came back to France for 1 year at my grandmother’s house, without his dad and he returned to French Guyana one year later too. And he did that until his 13th birthday because my grandmother was alcoholic and she couldn’t take care of my dad.

When he stayed in France forever, he grew up in the same city as my mother. But my dad had to become a drug dealer for a living because my grandmother was still alcoholic and he had a little brother and they had no money. The only way to make money was drug dealing. My dad’s step-father ill-treated my grandmother. It was difficult for him.

But my dad and my mom grew up together. When my mom was 17 years old my grandfather had a cancer and my mom stopped studying to work and help her family. When my mom was 20, her and my dad were already together. My grandfather died of a cancer, and my dad’s mom went to French Guyana.

They stayed together and I was born on October 19th 1997 in Paris. And in February 1998 my dad’s mom died because of an overdose in French Guyana, but my dad knew that only 4 months after. I know only my mom’s mother.

I live in Saint-Denis, in the suburb of Paris. I grew up there. I have been in my high school for 4 years. I hope that next year I will study history at the university. I have already been in Spain, Italy, Swizerland, Germany, French Guyana, Netherland and i would like to go to the United-States one day.

I dance new-style and dancehall and I have a crew. They are my best friends ever. I am so shy so they are almost my only friends. I have friends at school too, but sometimes because I am shy, I am not talking with people and they think that I am mean. Sometimes I don’t feel fit for this world.
I draw, more especially mangas, i like drawing, when I draw I am in my world. I think I said everything about myself. See you soon.

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