I Learn Library

A human library inspired by the stories in the film

“Am I going to stay?”

By AleTo  |   From : Kansas City  |   School : Shawnee Mission North


“Am I going to stay?” My name is Alejandra Tortolero. I am 18 years old, and I am an immigrant for the second time. I was born in Ontario, Oregon. When I was six years old, I immigrated to Mexico with my family and became a Mexican citizen. I lived in Nayarit, Mexico for almost eleven years. But on July 18, 2015, I came to visit my aunt and my uncle in Kansas City. It was the first time in eleven years that I was back in America. I noticed a lot of differences between Kansas City and Nayarit. First, the smell of Kansas City was cleaner and the music and food were different. In Nayarit, we don’t have diversity in the food. Also, in Nayarit we just have two buildings other than the modest houses.

I was happy to spend my vacation in Kansas City, but one day my dad told me that I wasn’t going back to Mexico. When I first heard that, I thought that it was a joke. I got confused because just two weeks before I told my mom that I wanted to stay in America, and she said, “No!” Now my mom changed her opinion and told me the same thing as my dad.  I was confused how my parents changed their minds. But I also felt lively at the same time because to learn English was and is my dream. The next day I woke up panicky because in the night I almost lost my mind thinking about one question so I decided to ask my dad, “Am I going to stay?” My dad answered, “Yes, you are going to stay.” I didn’t inquire about the topic any more. I remember when I was in Mexico asking my family to come live in the United States I thought in my future, and I didn’t realize that my dream to come back to the United States was coming real.

Now I am an immigrant in America living with my dad’s family. Sometimes I feel alone without my mom, my sisters, and my brothers in Mexico. I miss all the important days with them and long to go to the beach, play in the streets and I actually miss fight with my little brothers. However, I know that if I stay in America it is for the best for me and my future. Today I am studying at Shawnee Mission North High School making my dream come true. It is very difficult to learn another language, but it is worth the struggle because it is all for me and my family.


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