Sorry

I am from Honduras.  I decide to come to the United States because when Trump started to make and take away laws, I take away one, with which, my mother is going to claim me. We decided with a lot of courage and a lot of pain, that I was going to come to the United States.  As you know in Honduras there was (and there is) a great crisis as a policy as well as economic. Thinking about my future and my family, I decided to go only to the United States. 

I left Honduras with much regret even with tears, because I came alone and if something happened, nobody would know. I left almost at 2pm (Honduras time) I left the Sanpedro Sula (SPS) bus terminal. Leaving the terminal, with much anguish, despair and anxiety I left, hoping to be with my mother and brother for Christmas. I spent the first day very worried, (safe in Honduras) to at 4 AM cross Guatemala, spend the whole day crossing Guatemala, almost 13 hours to reach the border with Mexico. I crossed a large river with crocodiles in a raft (the name of the river is “Corozal”). I was afraid that the raft would tip over and I would drown or the crocodiles would eat me. It takes 5 minutes to pass, from one side to the other. 

We stayed in a town called a heart town.  I liked it, it was beautiful, and we rested for almost 10 hours. We left the town at almost 10 am and arrived at Palenque where we stayed for 1 whole day. We left Palenque almost at 12 or 1 pm, that was the longest trip I have taken by bus in my whole life! With a total of 1092 kilometers traveled! It was a 16-hour trip, when I arrived at Tampico I felt very happy. There was nothing left to get to the United States. They began to have problems. I ate a type of beans, but I got sick, vomited, and could not eat anything because I was throwing up. Even a salad I was throwing it up! 

We left Tampico at 9pm, and it took us to get to Reynosa (border with USA) almost 7 or 8 hours, literally 5 minutes from the border. I disappoint the anguish, I grab the migration, the disappointment the anguish, THE RABIA I had was inexplicable, how could this be happening to me! I felt very destitute, so much so that for the next 10 days that I passed, without eating I was very depressed. Every night I cried. I didn’t want to do anything, and I felt very alone. I met some friends, with whom I spent the next month. The day I was going to go my mother would say “come”, I have everything “fixed”. When they told me that day I left, I felt so happy, and at the same time sad. All that effort, just to return, BUT that dream gave me the reason to try again, because whoever does not risk, does not win.  I knew that my future was there. So in October I came back, almost the same thing happened, with the difference that this time I did not get sick and if I pass the border and walk almost for 5 hours to find an immigration police so he can deliver me, and the fear he had was for the coyotes. But I knew that, and I was almost there. Many hours of effort, dedication, and clear suffering, to arrive with a cop I would go and surrender. I spent 1 day in a cracel, from there, I moved to (the kennel) so it was called a place with many migrants (minors) who came alone, spent three days there, and always gave the same thing, a Burrito an apple and a juice, only occasionally a sandwich with ham and lettuce. After three days, they sent me to a place that “would make me feel at home” and the first 15 days I started to despair. A month I was already tired, I could not spend more time there, so I tried to get into more activities becoming the 2nd smartest in the whole house home. 

I have a diploma, but it is at home.  Christmas was coming and here I am buried.  I could not keep the tears!  Now, 2 days left for my birthday, no longer waiting, I began to see my social worker more often, and ask him almost with tears, to help me! I could resist Christmas, but my birthday? No, not that! One day was missing for my birthday and they called me. I still remember that moment in which my social worker told me, “You’re leaving! I can’t make sure it’s before your birthday but you’re less than a week away from leaving!” I didn’t care about my birthday anymore! Knowing that I had been given this gift in advance, I was already sad, one day after my birthday I could see my mother and my brother, I will remember this gift as the best of my life!

 thanks